Ministry
Ministry of Interior Decoration and National Administration
Cabinet Secretary: Hon. Silence M. Ngugi
Ensuring the decor of the state remains firmly bolted to the ceiling of civic life.
Government Directory
Ministries & State Departments
A complete directory of the ministries entrusted with implementing announcements, coordinating press releases and issuing regrets.
Ministry
Ministry of Foreign Selfies and Diaspora Affairs
Cabinet Secretary: Hon. Frequent Flier
Advancing Conya's image abroad while it deteriorates at home.
Ministry
National Treasury and Economic Storytelling
Cabinet Secretary: Hon. Prof. Balance Sheet
Reconciling the story of the economy with the economy of stories.
Ministry
Ministry of Information, Communications and Narrative Control
Cabinet Secretary: Hon. On-Message
Coordinating the timely release of the correct interpretation of events.
Ministry
Ministry of Affordable Housing Levies
Cabinet Secretary: Hon. Deduct M. Salary
Ensuring the levy is more accessible than the housing.
Ministry
Ministry of Health Contributions
Cabinet Secretary: Hon. Dr. Copay
Making healthcare a rich civic experience of registration.
Ministry
Ministry of Roads, Ribbons and Transport
Cabinet Secretary: Hon. Groundbreaker
Delivering roads in phases, particularly the ribbon phase.
Ministry
Ministry of Education Reforms Reform
Cabinet Secretary: Hon. Circular Memo
Continuously reforming the last reform of the reform.
Ministry
Ministry of Labour Announcements
Cabinet Secretary: Hon. Job Creator
Creating employment for people who announce employment creation.
Ministry
Ministry of Agriculture, Fertiliser and Photo Opportunities
Cabinet Secretary: Hon. Bag Standing
Delivering agricultural inputs to the frame of official photographs.
Ministry
Ministry of Environment, Summits and Seedlings
Cabinet Secretary: Hon. Sapling
Responding to environmental crises with seedlings and lanyards.
Ministry
Ministry of Youth Engagement During Election Years
Cabinet Secretary: Hon. Registration
Engaging the youth cyclically, every five years, precisely on schedule.
Ministry
Ministry of Public Service, Relatives and Strategic Appointments
Cabinet Secretary: Hon. Uncle in Chief
Maintaining a merit-based system in which the merit is being related.
Ministry
Ministry of Tourism and International Validation
Cabinet Secretary: Hon. Big Five
Selling the country to visitors and the visit to the country.
Ministry
Ministry of Water, Sanitation and Dry Taps
Cabinet Secretary: Hon. Bowser
Delivering water sustainably by tanker.
Ministry
Ministry of Energy Bills
Cabinet Secretary: Hon. Kilowatt
Ensuring bills arrive on time even when power does not.
Ministry
Ministry of Gender Statements
Cabinet Secretary: Hon. Deeply Concerned
Issuing timely statements of concern.
Ministry
Ministry of Sports Congratulations
Cabinet Secretary: Hon. Podium
Congratulating athletes after independent victory.
Ministry
Ministry of Mining Public Patience
Cabinet Secretary: Hon. Deep Vein
Extracting patience from citizens at industrial scale.
Ministry
Ministry of Cooperative Silence
Cabinet Secretary: Hon. Off-The-Record
Coordinating silence across cooperating institutions.
Agencies & State Offices
Constitutional Independence, Coordinated Centrally
Directorate of Criminal Incompetence
“Detecting criticism since independence.”
Responsible for receiving evidence, posing beside evidence and determining which office should avoid handling the evidence.
Office of the Director of Pending Prosecutions
“Your file is important to us.”
Providing independent prosecutorial consideration immediately after the investigation arrives.
Independent Policing Overlooking Authority
“We are looking into it.”
Providing civilian oversight through statements, preliminary findings and carefully scheduled concern.
Ethics and Anti-Corruption Commission of Selective Memory
“No fish too small.”
Protecting the country from junior officials carrying insufficient political protection.
Conya Revenue Appetite
“Together, we can tax everything.”
Mobilising domestic revenue from citizens yet to discover an exemption.
Public Service Commission of Cousins and Comrades
“Merit begins at home.”
Building an inclusive public service from a carefully selected collection of families.
State Department for Evidence Transfer
“From desk to desk.”
Ensuring evidence enjoys exposure to the widest possible range of government offices.